Just Because

A guy will do anything to stop a woman from nagging. You see, nagging to him is unattractive. Since men are solution-prone beings, they will find a way to keep you from turning ugly. It seems most women nag men for being commitment-phobes (I'm sure the DSM IV has a technical term for this but I'm too lazy to search for it right now). It stands to reason that he should introduce you to his family. This provides for you a sense of comfort and hope for the future. However, this could be an illusion of a commitment that isn't there.

Just because a guy has introduced you to his family, don't assume he respects you. If your subsequent visits are almost always during the night and noone sees you when you leave, be assured he only wants one thing from you. Your presence should not be determined by whispers and airy giggles. You should not be peeing in a cup nor should you have to starve to death in his private chambers. No love is worth that much loss of your dignity. A man who loves you will always make sure that his family sees your bestest (don't worry, they're adding this to the Collins Dictionary soonest) qualities. Are those qualities your benevolence, humour, culinary or sporting abilities? Or are you the Booty Call Express?

Just because a guy has introduced you to his family, don't assume he will be faithful. In a world where ladies out-number the men by a mile, it's an honour to meet his family. It's a step in the right direction; so you say. However this is not a promise of fidelity. Faithfulness to a person should not depend on grand public gestures. Dang, even a Top Billing wedding cannot secure your loved one to you. Fidelity comes from the heart. If a man has to prove how robust his faithfulness is, walk away.

Just because your man has introduced you to his family, don't assume he wants to marry you. He may invite you over to family braais, weddings and funerals (weird, I know). His parents will greet you with a kiss and his sisters become your sisters too. Hell, Christmas isn't the same if it's not with his family. Beware, he only does this to distract you. While you're gaining favour by playing monopoly with the in-lwas, he's out on the prowl with his boys.

Just because a guy has introduced you to his family, don't assume anything. It is unfortunate that we crave to be loved and to belong so badly that we have come to attach so much weight to such a simple as an introduction. You meeting his parents and him meeting your folks is nothing but an acknowledgment that you're dating and getting to know one another. Don't put pressure where none is due. A weightier matter is his patents getting to know yours.

So guys, please forgive me for divulging your secrets. Ladies please remember that not all men are like this. A man CAN introduce you to his family just because he wants them to see his reason for being so happy.

5 Tips For Taebo

A few weeks back I attempted to do some Taebo. Having had no regular exercise for approximately five years, I knew I was unfit. Very unfit. What I didn't bank for when I started the DVD was the emotional trauma that lay waiting ahead.

Never in my life have I felt to defeated, inferior, inept and frankly, clumsy. Here was this girl who could run for an hour and not break a sweat and then do early morning aerobics for the fun of it. If I was really bored I'd do an hour of aerobics. I wasn't a fitness fanatic; I was just fit. Years of playing in the street combined with school sports had kept me fit and I had taken it all for granted. Suddenly now I have to do a roundhouse kick and my leg won't budge. Oh dear, the mind was willing but the body just couldn't.

I thought I'd try again the following day, but tomorrow never came and THAT didnt bother me. It did come eventually, yesterday and the delay has made all the difference. Let me list them.

1. This time round I knew my inadequcies. I had accepted my limitations and was willing to work with them for my gain. My previous workout session had obliterated all my delusions of grandeur.

2. When I woke up I had already decided that I was going to do some Taebo so I put on my gym clothes and first chance I got (baby had a nap) I played the DVD without delay.

3. I distracted myself during the exercise. I focused on counting but took no notice of how many sets I was doing.

4. I aimed my attention at my reflection on the tv. That way I didn't have to see the skinny fit people doing what I couldn't. 

5. I challenged myself to enjoy what I was doing.

I must confess that after yesterday's workout I felt elated. Who's that train that said "I know I can. I know I can"? Well him... I had his spirit wash over me. I don't feel like such a failure anymore and today I have a date with Billy Blanks. Touch, let's go!